Life has changed. Again. I guess we asked for it.

Quite frankly, we were overwhelmed and didn't expect so many things.

On Tuesday last week, we called Social Services and asked if at least one of the children could be moved. One of the relatives of theirs was recently approved and so all three children were moved there to keep them together as much as possible. So on last Friday a nice social worker came and picked up our charges. We may possibly, no probably, run into them around Mobridge since we shop there fairly often and it's a small town of about 5,000. But we basically have no more to do with them officially.

Such a sudden ending to such an enormous task.

At times we feel like failures for not having the stamina to endure. At times we feel like staunch guardians of our children, who were becoming estranged. Mostly we are grateful for the small input we were able to give to these precious little souls and to provide a safe home when they needed it.

I don't know if we will be foster parents again. It took a lot of energy. Energy doesn't come from nothing which implies that other things lost out. So is the sacrifice worth the benefit if the benefit has no effect for us? Yes. And No. We still have a heart for these orphans, even temporary ones. What is the best way for us to help? We are still sorting out that.

For now, our house is very quiet during the days. Caleb joined the school across the street in January and Sarah joined in early March during all the hustle to find a little place of quiet. Neither is necessarily permanently gone. Quite possibly, we will be running a homeschool again come fall. But for now, I have time to recoup and recover. Life was not all bad when the little ones were here but life was not all good either.

Sorry to give you this confused email. I suppose that is how my heart is at the time. And we want to be open with our hearts, especially to you, because each of you is dear to us and we want to be honest.

In conclusion, our God has been good. We trust in his providential hand to move our lives only for his glory and not for our own. We trust, we trust, we trust and that is our hope.

Praying you too are filled with hope and wonder in Christ,

Blessings,

Marcia for the Swann's